Tiny Timmy, AKA Harry Potter, Explosive Apprentice
by Dragon Master Lunuser
Summary: Harry makes his first wish... EVA. And, knowing him, everything goes to f***ing shit. Now he must survive in the badassest badass place of all the badassest badass places! PPPAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRR RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, and he's with Tina. Mostly told by Tina. But some Harry.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: INSPIRATIONALLY NEW SERIES! MWUHAHAHAHAHHAHA! Derp. Anyways, dis is da most insanitiest insane story... EVA! Ohhai, Tina! Derp. Run ova dere. NOOOW! I need a bodonkadonk... NOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW! Nah, jk. ON. WITH. the. STOREE!**

**Summary: Harry makes a wish for his first time... EVA. And, knowing him, everything goes to f***ing shit. Now he must survive in the badassest badass place of all the badassest badass places! PAAAANNNDDDOOOORRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, and he's with Tina. Mostly told by Tina. But some Harry.**

**Title: Tiny Timmy, AKA Harry Potter, Explosive Apprentice.**

_Surrey, that one abusive home, Cupboard thing-place._

One little soon-to-be badass was laying, crippled, on the ground as a bloody pulp. He was 5 1/2 years old, and small for any child his age. He looked at a giant-badass-meteor and wished he had somebody who would take care of him, properly of course, until he left. Then the giant-badass-meteor crashed onto the face of the Earth and drove through it. However, Our little soon-to-be Badass had used his badass, Siren-related, and did I mention badass, powers to do and INTER-WORLD-AND-UNIVERSE-AND-DIMENSIONAL phase!

_Pandora, random train, random dynamite-filled room._

KAAA-BLAGFHAKJHFDKAHLFHDKJAHFLA!

That was a phase noise! Heh. So the kid phased directly in front of me-I think it's called phasin'... WHATEVA! So he did that shit... and I was, like, surprised. Then dere wassome BOOOOMS! and the choo-choo went boom-boom. To put it in a way Krieg understands. (Krieg: YOU'LL BE PART OF MY SHINY NEW MEAT BICYCLE!)... So I grabbed him (He looked cuter when he got better! SO CUTE.) and my dynamite and ran away. "Runnin' runnin' runnin', runnin' dis way. I'ma runnin' runnin' runnin', away from dat place!" I sang and the blood-covered kid pushed his head into my hand.

SO CUTE... and so, we got off da train and we found a nice cavern with a run-down garage in it. And he fell asleep. I found a small bed and put him in it. And I found a BIGGERER bed and slept in that.

DA NEXT DAY

So I woke up and saw the little kid sleeping, and mysteriously almost completely healed. He woke up and he looked around fearfully. "W-Where am I-I? Wh-Who a-are yo-you?" he asked fearfully, his gaze turning to me. "Well this is my new cavern, and I'm Tiny Tina! Who're you?!" I replied to the frieghtened CUTE kid. "I-I don-donno. F-Freak, I g-guess." he replied, fearfully once again. "Your name can't be Freak! That's a bad, mean name! Do you want me to give you a REAL name?" I asked cheerfully. He nodded shakily-ish. "How about... TINY TIMMY!?" I yelled, and he jumped. "Okay..." He smiled shakily. My next words changed both our lives for the better.

"Do you wanna be my Apprentice in explosives?"

**Yay! This idea was stuck in my head since noon! TROLOLOLOL!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everybody! Thx for all the reviews! This is the best day ever! Just because all of you reviewed happily, I will continue this! I've also decided that I'll reply to reviewers.**

**Rude and Annoying Guest: Then why did you review?**

**Lord Shadowstorm: My first KIND AND AWESOME REVIEW! That would also be my first and second reaction :P**

**Wizle: Oh I will... I WILL.**

**Kind and Awesome Guest: I totally agree. My brain was in the On crack moment. And it still is. :3-{ Cat. You should totally get and account!**

**Seer of Rage: Dude. Yes, I absolutelehfartingly explosivley agree. And, once again, get and account. Plz.**

**Slifer88: Yep. Same here. I'm excited about this little plot bunny. *looks at it* It's so cute :3**

**Yup. I named this cute little plot bunny Kace. It's wierd version of cake!**

**CONFUSIOOOOON!**

**Anyways, Thx for reviewing, everybody! Except for RaA Guest.**

**_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep _Beep_Beep_Beep_Beep_**

Tiny Timmy was hanging from a random piping on the ceilinging holding a C44. This was a PRIIIIIICCCCEEEELLLLEEEESSSSS EXPLOSIVE. This was his 4th job of blowin da hell outta dose banditos! Heh. So he planteded the bomb in a pott and ran away. And jumpded off the cliffz edge and landed on the ground on his back and he wasn't harmded at all! PANDORA PHYSICS!

I just realizded what that meant. SKYDIVINGING FROM THE MOON! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHA! (Brick: That was the single greatest idea you have EVER come up with. EVER!)

And den da C44 Explodeded. and the psycho Krieg idiot-dumbass-guy-iforgottheotherinsult from dat camp yelled something about meat bicycles and poop trains... Ooookaaay? And den Timmy ran all da way back to our little cavern and den I asked what happended, and he saided "Well I startded out hangin' from a pipe and planted da bomb _in a pot_. 'nd then I just 'umpded of da cliff and ran back here! Oh, and that Krieg guy yelled somethin 'long da lines 'f meat bikes and poo' trains!" (Timmy: That is NOT how I said it.)

"Cool! Well, I donno what you mean, but nonedaless! Cool!" I said. I then told him that I had been hired to do somethin' with him! So then I told him dat we were hiyad by...

**CLIFFIE! MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAA! Do you hate me? Probably. Review!**


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